This is an anti-Valentines newsletter. If you were hoping for an essay full of crayon drawn hearts and Valentine’s cards, then stop reading now.
Usually, Valentine’s Day is not even a thought outside of work. At an elementary building, everything is celebrated: the beginning of the month, lost teeth, but especially Valentine’s day. The exchange of cards among classmates makes the whole building buzz.
My husband and I celebrated every day and did not reserve these affections for days dictated by Hallmark. He often said he was not going to buy me a card just because it was a certain date on the calendar. We showed each other we loved each other every day. I have two cards he gave and wrote in next to my bed. I look at them every day.
Having said that, Valentine's Day bothers me this year. I don’t want to see the hearts, cards and candy. This year it represents the reminder of abandonment that has happened to me my entire life. I am just now learning to recognize this emotional response and the stories that it emerges from so I can learn to react differently. I just wish I had learned of some of these techniques earlier.
Currently, I am plunging into the unknown. This is always the case with life, but it feels bigger to me now. You may feel this same way depending on the circumstances of your life. In many respects I am alone for the first time in my life. Yes, I have people connected to me and help but it feels different now without my husband. People try to reach out to help but it feels like no one can help. I just have to keep moving forward so my life gets bigger and makes the grief appear like it is diminishing. The truth is, it will never get smaller.
How do you feel about Valentine’s Day and the unknown?
I have a few recommendations for you this week
Simily This new publication site is being talked about as the new Medium, but fiction and poetry friendly. Some of us wish we would have gotten in on the ground floor of Medium. Here is your chance with Simily. I have been playing around with it and wanted to let you know about it too!
Crow Collective This group is run by the amazing Sage Tyrtle [Isn’t that the best name?] There are paid workshops and also free writing prompt sessions every weekend. She has several times available to sign up. I attended an event called Prompt Crew which featured three writers who shared their drafts to a prompts we all wrote toward. It was an interactive experience and so much fun. It was spontaneous as well which led to some surprises. It is a fantastic community and was loads of fun.
Tarot & Writing Class I am launching my class at the end of this February. Details are coming soon! It will be a multiple week class because although it is generative, more time is needed per prompt. There will be a spread and a writing assignment each week.
You do need a tarot card deck, but do not need any prior knowledge of the cards or how to read them. It will be hosted on a private Wordpress site, so all your writing and conversation will be secure. I invite you to explore a new way to get out of your own way.
I invite you to join my PUSH group!!
What is a PUSH group? It is Conversation, Community, Writing
PUSH groups are the heartbeat of the community space provided by TammyB. It is intelligent conversation with creative people.
Gatherings are the 2nd and 4th Mondays at 7 p.m. Central/ 8 p.m. Eastern
Our next meeting is our monthly Writing Circle on Feb. 21. We will use influence to fuel our writing as we create together.
Each bi-weekly hour-long meeting focuses on curiosity and wonder. We share wins and experiences, write together, laugh, and are open to new ideas.
The second meeting of the month will be a writing circle where we will write together, share, and give feedback with a non-critique method.
Payment of $15.00/per month to PayPal will secure a spot for the month.
If you would like to pay ahead you may!
$90 for 6-month enrollment
You can enroll for PUSH groups here. Please make sure to include your email in the notes! You will receive the Zoom link for the month when your registration is confirmed.
If you have trouble with the paypal.me link you can search for me by my email tammybreitweiser@gmail.com or @tammybreitweiser1 in PayPal.
I look forward to seeing you!
NO ONE will be left behind due to financial hardship. If you need an alternative price point just reply let me know. You are welcome however you are!
Tammy L. Breitweiser writes, walks, inspires, and teaches. She is the conjurer of everyday magic with short concise stories. Her fiction has been published in Gone Lawn, Cabinets of Heed, Spelk, Five on the Fifth, Clover and White, Fiction Berlin Kitchen, and Elephants Never.
With my own grief experience, if help was someone's effort to make the grief go away, then there was never going to be help. But if help was simply being a bit of light in the darkness, well, that was a different thing.
As for Valentine's Day, I get a kick out of how people can celebrate, but we don't do anything for it. Our son's birthday is the day after, and this time of year is always tough for our finances. We'd rather spend the money on his day.
Your Tarot class looks great! Good luck with it! And lots of good thoughts and light to you.
I hope your grief becomes memories that make you smile and laugh, making your life richer.